The 5th Puzzle And A Guzzle: 1960s Games

 THE PUZZLE AND THE GUZZLE:

A craft beer here. Rudie India Pale Ale.

The Guzzler found this a pleasant jigsaw to construct up to a point. And that point was when he saw what remains to this day THE SCARIEST JIGSAW PIECE HE HAS EVER SEEN.

Given that the subject matter of this jigsaw is 1960s Children's Games, it's even more scary. The Guzzler thinks they must have made kids tougher back then. Any games company trying to flog this sort of business to kids today would receive short shrift. Possibly legal action.

Here is the offending piece in context:

Kuryakin from the Man From U.N.C.L.E. Not the most flattering rendition of his visage.

Horror aside, The Guzzler found this puzzle a breath of fresh air when compared to the map-based challenges he'd set himself recently.

Here's a few shots of the jigsaw under construction.

Ahhh, a teddy bear.

A not quite so cuddly deadly Dalek...

And the first bit The Guzzler finished - Twister.

The Guzzler enjoyed his craft ale, but remains haunted by that piece.

Yes, that piece.

Here's the finished puzzle:

JIGSAW ENJOYABILITY: 7
Would have been an 8, bar for that horrific piece.

JIGSAW TRICKINESS: 4
Super varied pieces when compared to previous maps.

Sleep well.

The 4th Puzzle And A Guzzle: London A to Z

THE PUZZLE AND THE GUZZLE:

That's about as close to an A to Z as a can of lager should ever get.

So says The Guzzler, puzzler extraordinaire, and observer of the Highway Code as much as, if not more than, the next man.

The Guzzler would never dream of storing alcoholic beverages in his glove box alongside his driving gloves, half-finished tube of Extra Strong mints, spare fuses, loose change and stained and dog-eared A to Z, the road atlas any discerning driver wouldn't leave home without.

Intending to improve his knowledge of London's streets, The Guzzler undertook the challenge offered by this 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle of the roads, parks and stations of England's capital city. In association with a French lager.

Having checked that the Congestion Charge didn't apply, and that air pollution was at a safe rate, The Guzzler opened the box and immediately dipped his toes in The Thames, the swathe of blue that cut through this puzzle.

The greenery of the parks was next:

and the logo top left. But those aside, what a beaster this proved to be. Certainly many of London's streets seemed to be paved in gold. The same golden colour.

The Guzzler needed the strength of that Kronenbourg, and nearly 1664 minutes to get through it.

The Guzzler experienced the whole A to Z of emotions, from Anger to the Zzzzzz of utter boredom.

But when the Guzzler reached the point of despair, the black train lines gave fresh impetus, along with the Kronenbourg of course.

With the finish in sight, it became evident, something was lacking in east London...

As The Guzzler knows only too well, the longer a puzzle takes, the higher the chance of a piece of the jigsaw going missing.

Even the experts at New Scotland Yard and Baker Street (both on this map) would struggle to locate the missing edge piece. Did it ever exist? We will never know.

It proved the only blot on an otherwise eye-catching landscape...

As a sad footnote to the story of this Puzzle And A Guzzle, one of the fish that swam in the tank just in view behind, passed away soon after the completion of the puzzle, his spirit forever swimming up the blue swathe of The Thames. RIP Bobby.

JIGSAW ENJOYABILITY: 4
Good for expanding knowledge of London. Bad for tired eyes late at night, especially under the influence of Kronenbourg 1664.

JIGSAW TRICKINESS: 8
Almost as difficult as the 3rd Puzzle And A Guzzle, but the presence of variation in every piece, and local knowledge of some of the London areas made the task a little easier.

The 3rd Puzzle And A Guzzle: London Underground Map Harry Beck (1933)

This puzzle

was tackled with dubious help from:

8 bottles of ST CERVOIS Continental Lager. Brewed in Scotland. Hmmm. That's about as Continental as Wensleydale cheese.

It didn't take a puzzling genius to work out that tacking this beige beast of a 1000 piecer was to be a tale of two halves.

The first required the piecing together of the map, station stops and underground lines from the early days of the London tube network. The second stage would require the jigsawing of the remaining beige outer, a task I predicted would take at least two weeks and most of the lager. And so it proved.

A puzzle that takes so long is inevitably going to take some damage. Take this stain at Regents Park. Butter dripping from a thickly laden slice of wholemeal? Tea dribbling from a fresh cup? Scottish-brewed Continental lager? Snot? Even the great British detective who resided at the next station on the line would struggle to solve that mystery.

Another stained piece top right led to this ill-fit. But even more disturbing, especially for puzzlers who like to start with the edges, is the difficulty of the bordering around the entire puzzle. Much lager was supped (and spilt) trying to solve it. 

Some pieces had fit snugly in the wrong place, at least on one or two sides. This required a complete reconstruction of some patches of edge once the inside had been completed. London's a dangerous place, where trying to fit in with your surroundings sometimes doesn't work out. And this puzzle proves that.

The 8 bottles of Cervois did not last the duration, so your Guzzling Puzzler was forced to drink Yorkshire Tea until completion.

Users of the London Underground will be used to delays, and there was certainly a big hold up on the lines doing this. The Guzzling Puzzler can only apologise for the delay caused to your journey.

JIGSAW ENJOYABILITY: 3

So much beige made this puzzle a real challenge

JIGSAW TRICKINESS: 9 

The bits with something on them other than pure beige were easy. The rest? They nearly derailed the Guzzling Puzzler.

The 2nd Puzzle And A Guzzle: The Snowman's Gift.

THE STORY OF THE SNOWMAN'S GIFT JIGSAW PUZZLE

In association with

This festive puzzle appeared in early January, post-festive season. The scant supply of alcohol that had been purchased for Christmas had long been drained. So new supplies had to be purloined for the task. What with it being January, the month in which alcohol consumption is most frowned upon, it was thought prudent to purchase smaller cans. Six of them.

There were serious doubts that such a fiendish looking snow-filled, sky-filled 1000 piecer could be completed before the onset of festivities for the following Christmas, especially as the puzzle sessions were to be fuelled by these little tinny beauties of Heineken, the beer that used to refresh the places other beers cannot reach. Until saying such unsubstantiated statements was outlawed.

Any attempts to crack the reindeers early doors were soon abandoned. It was neigh on impossible to tell Blitzen from Shitzen and the other fellas from Rudolph. However, Santa and his sleigh provided a good start point with enough different wrapping paper colours to piece er... the pieces together before frustration set in and the pieces were returned to their box in disgust.

The line of nosey animals in the foreground came together slowly and piecemeal. So many spindly legs in snow to contend with. Who could tell a horse's leg from a foxes from a doe's? Not I , especially with Heineken inside.

The strip of orange sky proved easier than anticipated, completion greeted by the cracking open can five of six.

The last beast to be completed turned out to be the goose, its white neck so snow white it looked like snow.

The Huzzah with Heineken! Completion came in good time, well afore the following year's festivities were on the horizon.

MOST MEMORABLE MOMENT: The discovery of a missing piece in the dishwasher. Yes, the dishwasher.

As the jigsaw was being formed on the kitchen island, it was oft used as a makeshift surface for crockery and cutlery. The only feasible explanation is that the piece became affixed to the moist underside of a mug of tea and transported to said dishwasher, where it received a thorough clean, totally wiping the image from the surface. A minor flesh wound betwixt one of Santa's reindeer's legs that you can hardly see. As you can see. Ahem...






JIGSAW ENJOYABILITY: 4 
The picture seemed slightly blurred. Or was that the effects of the alcohol?

JIGSAW TRICKINESS: 7 
A lot of snow and sky to contend with.

JIGSAW MONEY SHOTS:

The 1st Puzzle And A Guzzle: Birds In The Snow

In association with a six-pack of Carling Black Label.


Four nights were available to complete this 1000-piecer . I had hired a caravan in the New Forest for an autumnal Monday to Friday half term holiday.

Doubts prevailed as to whether the puzzle would be completed before the keys to the mobile home would have to be returned to the owner. Especially when this little lot appeared out of the fridge:



Would I be repacking the puzzle incomplete and defeated come Friday morn?

After the first two of those nights, that looked likely. I was only lightly inebriated as I sat down each time, but the alcohol, combined with my exposure to the fresh air of southern England weighed heavy and progress was slow. A careless sleeve repeatedly swept stray pieces onto the linoleum floor. Tea was brewed in a foreign pot and imbibed in the hope it would battle the lager and enliven mind and spirit, and concentrate the grey matter on the task at hand.

But the snow. So much snow. And beaks and feathers and...

But the eye was drawn to the pockets of red, and pieces sporting this colour were split from the rest of the pack. Edges too found themselves congregating on the periphery of the caravan table.

The birdseed holder was pieced together first.

Night three was where big progress was made, and although it ended with me still at least 200 shy of completion, a finish in four days looked possible.

And so it proved.

As ever, fewer options remaining led to a swift jigsaw denouement, celebrated with the last of a six pack of Carling cans, a smooth, unassuming drink in a cool can that reminds me of a Pierre Cardin shirt I owned in the late 1980s.

The puzzle was left in situ overnight before being swept back into its box the following morn, and swiftly packed away along with the rest of our holiday paraphernalia.

Time to RSVP the RSPB. These wild birds had been tamed.

MOST MEMORABLE MOMENT: The realisation on Day 3 that there was a bird in the picture that I hadn't seen on Days 1 and 2.

Ratings (out of 10)

ENJOYABILITY: 6

TRICKINESS: 5

THE MONEY SHOT: